I ran through the trees, desperately trying to escape that environment as fast as I could and throw off the feeling it left behind. I slowed down as I reached my destination: a clump of tree stumps in a forest laying sideways on the ground. They were badly scratched and sliced from times similar to now, when I couldn’t control my emotions.
I stopped in front of the closest stump to catch my breath, one hand on my head and the other on my pocket. Steadily reaching into it, I pulled out a dagger and held it tight. The curved pattern dug into my palm as I gripped the weapon but I didn’t mind. This dagger was what brought me peace; if I focused on it long enough, I’d calm down. Yet the thoughts of what had just happened returned to the front of my mind. I’d messed up my mission and completely ruined it for everyone else…for me…for her. That was the only thing on my mind, how I had let her down. It was my one job and I failed to achieve it.
Raising my knife hand, I took a few deep breaths, looked at my target and threw. I missed and cursed loudly. FAILURE, said a voice in my head and I tensed up. It would only help if I made it. I walked over to pick up my knife and try again. This time I hit the target but barely. The collision made the Boinging, thwack sound of metal on wood and I breathed a small sigh of relief.
I retrieved the knife and tried again and again, aiming and throwing until I felt my shoulders fall and my breathing slow but even so, a small part in the back of my head kept going through it. How could I have messed it up? How did they escape through my clenched fist? So close to success but those 120 seconds changed it and I lost it all. My mind went through ideas and I realized I would have to talk to her and fix this on my own. I grunted, annoyed and tired.
So I aimed one last time for the stump, clearing my head and focusing forward. Thwack! A small smile escaped my lips; bullseye.