7 Years by Anonymous

I used to be a shy kid. I would go to school, not talk to anyone besides, of course, the necessities. Teachers with questions or classmates during required group projects. Getting bullied was difficult. I was the kid that all the teachers worried about. The parent-teacher conferences never ended. They always talked about what the adults called “the concern”. At the end of the day I would come home and practically leap right up the stairs to my room. I spent most of my days there. My parents soon noticed this pattern of mine and I could tell that they were getting worried. One day they interrupted my almost robotic pattern and my mom, in her usual worried tone, told me, “Go make yourself some friends, or you’ll be lonely”. I know that she is just trying to help me, but it still hurt me to hear it from her. 

By 11, I started doing things that I knew that I shouldn’t have. I knew that I needed to grow up soon or later, but I just wasn’t ready for that yet. I wanted to stay a kid forever. Growing up was hard, avoiding it was easier. Despite that, my parents never stopped pushing me. My dad tried the same strategy that year. He told me, “Go get yourself a wife, or you’ll be lonely”. To me, when you find a wife and have a family, your childhood, and all the happiness along with it, is over. I wasn’t ready for that yet. I had all these feelings bundled up, and I didn’t know what to do with them. So I started writing about them, which I soon realized helped me organize my thoughts. It was almost like a therapist on paper. This was something that my childhood could be remembered for. Something that I would remember forever. My writings started to have tempos, and then rhymes which then turned into beats. Soon they started to form songs.

And then, all of a sudden, I blinked and I was 20 years old. Many of the checkpoints towards my dreams had already been crossed. My career as an artist began to grow along with my relationship with my closest of friends. They were my teammates in this journey of life. The people that had supported me since I was a child finally joined my music career along with me. We were determined to become great. What was once just a hobby to help me process life, became a dream of ours to share. And we were slowly approaching that dream. 

By 30 years old, our songs were getting sold to more than just supportive friends and family. It was the start of our success. The start of what we had thought about day and night for years was now coming to a reality. We traveled around the world together. Almost like the real singers that I had once looked up to. The singers that made my childhood. The songs that signified happiness when I was just 7 years old. But now my life looks different. A wife and kids burst into my life. It was nothing like the end that I had anticipated. I still found great happiness in everything around me, just as I did when I was 11. I taught my children everything I knew. The glory following hard work, and all the other feelings that I had put in my songs since I was little. They have learned well. Now older, my kids are out in the world doing great things, some inspired by my songs and stories and some paving their own path like I had done to achieve my dreams. I am so proud of them.

Soon I will be 60 years old, almost the age that my dad was at as I remembered him. I now see that all he wanted for me was the same happiness that he had. The family and friends that bring meaning to life. And everything he did, whether I saw it as a kid or not, was for my benefit. I wrote a letter expressing my gratitude to him for this once, and his face lit up. It was in a way that I know means that he achieved his own goals, right along with my success. My goals were his to share. I wish for the same pride and accomplishment in my kids one day when they come home to visit me. I hope so much that they do come home to visit me. I hope that I can find happiness in my old age with my close friends and family around me. The same friends and family that my mom pushed me to find in my childhood. I now see why. As a kid, I hadn’t seen the big picture. But the reason that it all worked out was because I had people that saw it for me. The parents that always guided me in the right direction. Now, I am grateful for being 7 years old and my mom finding me friends, or 11 years old when my dad pushed me to settle down. I know that a younger version of myself, looking at what I turned into, would be proud.